Relationship-based fundraising: What’s it really about?
When I started my nonprofit career, a debate was raging on fundraising teams: Is fundraising sales?
On one side, fundraisers argued that ‘mechanically’ fundraising and sales are the same—or should be anyway. Make a list, work the list, using metrics to keep you on track. It’s the science, they argued, that drives fundraising success. On the other, fundraisers recoiled at the distillation of the subtle art of relationships into something so cold and calculated… and, well, let’s just say it, icky.
Today, the most successful fundraising teams have embraced that relationship-based fundraising both is and isn’t sales. What is emerging is a new formula:
Relationship-based fundraising = the heart of the community + the science of sales + the art of authentic relationships.
What successful teams are testing and proving is that today’s relationship-based fundraising isn’t about any one donor or one fundraiser, or even any particular type of gifts. It is harnessing the power of relationships—and many of them. It is using data and systems to stay more connected more consistently. It is a strategic business model for generating revenue growth to fuel a vision. It is using our agency to create abundance for our missions.
Heart of the community
The most important inflection point in our profession’s history is the step back we’ve taken to ask: Wait, what are we doing here? Nonprofits, individually and collectively, have begun to reckon with our sector’s complicity as both products and perpetrators of systemic racism and injustice.
“Conversations with donors are getting more meaningful and partnerships more values-aligned. We are uncovering exciting opportunities for real change.”
The community-centric fundraising movement was born in the wake of George Floyd’s murder. A group of courageous fundraisers stood up and said: We don’t only need philanthropy to do more. We need it to do better. And that means that we, as fundraisers, need to rethink not only what our jobs are, but why they are.
A fundraising model grounded in equity and social justice was born. Today, it is forming the new foundation of relationship-based fundraising. Before relationship-based fundraising is ‘art’ or ‘science’, it is community.
Day-to-day, rooting relationship-based fundraising in the community-centric model means building relationships rooted in purpose—relationships that create space for both parties to see, hear, value, and center people with lived experience. Practically speaking, it means having more, richer, and more honest conversations.
This is difficult work. And as a fundraising sector, we are just beginning to unpack what it really looks like. So far, experience is showing that it’s not only the right thing to do—it’s worth it. Our fundraising better reflects the communities our organizations serves.
Conversations with donors are getting more meaningful and partnerships more values-aligned. We are uncovering exciting opportunities for real change.
Science of sales
The ‘science’ part of fundraising is often chalked up to data and metrics and ‘pitches’. In reality, it is about agency and intentionality.
“The best thing that the infusion of the ‘science of sales’ has done for our profession is wake us up to our own power.”
The origins of our profession in traditions of ‘charity’ have done us a disservice. We have internalized an implicit devaluation of nonprofits as our society’s nice-to-have organizations—funded by the benevolence of the wealthy and run by people who can’t get ‘real jobs.’ (True story: Someone said that to me in an interview once!) This internalized subservient status makes us feel like fundraising is ‘begging’ or asking for favors. We feel at the mercy of the whims of others, feel we must host extravagant soirees to convince people to throw a few thousand dollars our way, feel our fortunes lie in the hands of forces entirely beyond our control.
The best thing that the infusion of the ‘science of sales’ has done for our profession is wake us up to our own power. We can create a list. We can get on the phone, out in the community, having conversations. We can find people who care about what we care about. We can ask them to join us. And we can do this over and over again, at whatever scale we need to reach the goals we have. We can create our own abundance.
The most successful fundraisers I know are not the ones with the magic Rolodex. They are the ones who understand their own power to start conversations and find opportunities and create partnerships.
With an understanding of that power, they understand the value of their time and energy. Just because we do good work, doesn’t mean our time and energy is free. It is precious—as precious as a donor’s, as a board member’s, as our counterpart’s in sales at XYZ Fancy Corporation.
The science of sales equips us to bring rigorous intentionality to how we invest our time and energy. It allows us to decide how we want to use our power—what abundance we want to create.
Art of authentic relationships
All that said, it is true. Fundraising is not sales.
Why? We are not selling widgets. We are selling hope.
Most obviously, what distinguishes our ‘product’ is its intangibility. But it’s more than that. What is most compelling, most distinct about what we are ‘selling’ is that it is deeply personal.
“The most effective fundraisers never lose sight of their humanity as fundraisers, the humanity of donors, and the humanity of the community. ”
Every day, when we get to know a donor, we are essentially asking: What kind of world do you dream of? What is the impossible that you imagine could become possible?
There is a vulnerability to seeking such a confession from another person, and an even deeper vulnerability in sharing it.
This is where ‘it’s all about relationships’ comes in. The most effective fundraisers never lose sight of their humanity as fundraisers, the humanity of donors, and the humanity of the community. While using the ‘science’ as a tool, their craft is one of radical ‘presence’, really being with people, really listening, and really caring.
At the end of the day, relationship-based fundraising is courage. The courage to learn and unlearn. The courage to have the real conversations. The courage to reclaim power. The courage to take the reigns and create abundance. The courage to be vulnerable and to hold space for vulnerability. And the courage to ask: Join me in making the impossible possible.
Bianca Deroeune
Bianca founded Aperio Philanthropy in 2018. She specializes in designing and launching streamlined business models that enable nonprofits to realize their fundraising potential—sustainably. Prior to founding Aperio, Bianca helped lead the creation of a nationwide philanthropy program at The Leukemia & Lymphoma Society (LLS).