It’s time to step outside your comfort zone
By Amy Casey
In this year of transformation, nonprofit leaders and fundraisers are telling us: “We don’t want to go back, we want to move forward.” To keep the pedal to the metal on transforming our missions, our teams, and ourselves, it’s time to get comfortable—that is, comfortable with being uncomfortable.
I’m a creature of habit. Introverted. Thoughtful and slow to rock the boat.
But I am also a natural-born problem solver—with more confidence than I should have. I will disrupt—just slowly and methodically. With these two traits so core to my being, I know a thing or two about getting outside my comfort zone.
We each face times when we must grow, when coloring outside the lines is the only option for fulfillment or even survival. Now is one of those times. As we all think about who we want to be next and what we want to contribute next, we will find ourselves stretching in new ways.
What question have I never asked?
What possibility would I like to explore?
What is standing in my way?
What do I want to learn? How do I want grow?
What strengths do I already have that I may not be seeing? How can I use them?
From my experience, that means we need to be ready.
1. Be ready to make mistakes
Why is something outside our comfort zone? Because it’s unknown territory. Or a place we’ve been before at another time in our lives that didn’t go so well. It is everything we told ourselves we can’t do or be, whether from experience, from someone else’s two cents, or society at large making the rules.
So, what does it take to push against those limits?
Act and try before you overthink and talk yourself out of it.
Get to know someone who has made the same leap. Ask how they took the first step—which is always the hardest!
And most importantly, plan on making mistakes.
When you’re outside your comfort zone, you will make mistakes. And that’s a good thing. The best piece of advice we’ve gotten as a new firm is: “If you’re not making mistakes, you’re not thinking big enough.”
Bringing our big ideas to life for ourselves, for our teams, for our missions will require trying new things and iterating as we go. To do that, we need to reset our relationship with mistakes. Mistakes, even failures, are not something to fear or be ashamed of. They are signs of growth, like badges we should wear proudly to share: We’re learning.
As you begin to navigate your mistakes and failures as steps on the ladder toward ambitious goals, those around you—personally, professionally, and beyond—will join you and give you the space to recover, learn, and progress.
2. Be ready to listen
An echo chamber is great at producing echoes and not much else. The same people who create space for us to fail are the ones who plant seeds to help us grow. Their diversity of thought and opinion is critical—especially those whose ideas are different and challenging.
To cultivate this system:
Network for networking’s sake. And go beyond group activities. Set up a catch-up call with a colleague you used to know. Ask them if they can introduce you to someone new.
Be curious. Ask others: What are you proud of? What are you struggling with? What advice do you have for me?
Decide who you want to listen to and surround yourself with them. Who are the people who are where you want to be?
Listen for ideas that you’ve never considered. Write them down and let them marinate with yours. What doors do you see opening?
Accept feedback, even constructive criticism.
Believe the compliments and the hype about you.
The hardest part about thinking big is creating the space—mentally and emotionally—to imagine things that do not yet exist. Our brains are trained to anticipate a future that looks a lot like the past and the present. It’s hard for us to imagine a radically new direction or the full scope of possibilities.
Listen to and engage with people you trust. Take the leap and let your ‘armor’ down. Say what you really feel and ask what you really want to know. You’ll be surprised how much people wish to see you succeed—and how much you can gain by letting down defenses and letting ideas, feedback, and affirmations in!
3. Be ready to learn
Skill-building can push you over some humps and be a core component of creating the change you seek—but it’s not all of it. You have a lifetime to learn. But more importantly, looking at some of the tough questions challenges us to examine our values and priorities. Giving ourselves the permission to want what we want is the glue that binds. This is about and for you, nobody else.
Question your assumptions about what you can and cannot do. You can learn more than you think you can.
Make a list of what you want to learn. Technical skills? Communication skills? Fundraising skills? Leadership skills? Be specific. Ask someone you trust to help you identify growth opportunities you may not even see yourself.
Make choices. We can’t learn everything simultaneously. What do you want to learn first? What’s most exciting to you?
Do the worst thing first. If there is something that has been really standing in your way and keeping you up at night, start there.
Find learning buddies. No matter what you’re learning, someone around you is trying to learn the same thing. Use classes, colleagues, or others in your network as motivation, accountability, and support for pushing through when you hit snags.
Give yourself permission to focus on yourself.
Most importantly, be kind to yourself. Growth takes time, and it won’t always be fun and easy. You’re going to hit snags, get confused, and worry that you’re missing something. You’re also going to feel inspired, grow confident, and surprise yourself.
4. Be ready to face your fears
Professionally, I am experiencing a renaissance in direct correlation to the most difficult time of my life. Watching my mother die from breast cancer while managing a toddler at home alone during COVID was awful. It sucked. And even then, it was not the worst possible thing that could happen.
Drawing from this experience opened my eyes to what I was really afraid of, helped me reimagine failure, and in turn, widened my aperture on life and career. Each of our lives. is rich in experiences good, bad, ugly (90s skinny eyebrows, anyone?) that can help guide you.
Here’s how to push against those fears:
Consider the entirety of your lived experience.
Think, journal, or talk to someone you trust about: What is it exactly that you are fearing? Where does that fear come from?
Be compassionate with yourself. Your fear is natural.
…and then do the things you fear anyway.
Forget the “hows” and just focus on the “why.”
As you think about the road ahead beyond “the zone,” outside of any 3a.m. anxiety death spiral, is the worst you can imagine actually that bad? That’s for you to decide but I would not be surprised if it’s “no.”
5. Be ready to accept your worth
Now you’ve got me: This is my struggle. This is where I fake it until I make it. My old friend imposter syndrome is along the for the ride—and she brought sandwiches. In my own journey, I recognize this step—accepting your worth—to be the most important because it’s the most difficult for me. So, I’ve saved it for last.
But no matter where you start along the way, it’s ok to start from a place of strength. Strength is not comfort, but rather knowing who you are and where you want to go. Accept those things, question where they limit you and give you fuel, and let yourself wrestle it out. Maybe you can write this chapter (please message me!). When we hear the phrase “getting outside your comfort zone,” it’s often in one ear and out the other. But stories of stretching beyond the limits resonate when we, too, are wondering what’s on the other side. Thank you for opening yourself to realizing your full potential. The world needs you!
Amy Casey
Amy’s career has focused on helping non-profits thrive so they can better serve others and drive impact. She specializes in prospect research and donor solicitation as well as in program design and evaluation.
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